CHAPTER 5: CAN OBSTACLES ACTUALLY ENHANCE AN ATTITUDE?
"The greatest battle you wage against failure occurs on the inside, not the outside"
1. People naturally tend toward inertia. That’s why self-improvement is such a struggle. But that’s also the reason that adversity lies at the heart of every success. The process of achievement comes through repeated failures and the constant struggle to climb to a higher level.
2. When it comes to facing failure, most people will grudgingly concede that any person must make it through some adversity in order to succeed. They’ll acknowledge that you have to experience the occasional setback to make progress. But I believe that success comes only if you take that thought one step further. In order to achieve your dreams, you must embrace adversity and make failure a regular part of your life. If you’re not failing, you’re probably not really moving forward.
3. The benefits of adversity:
• Adversity creates resilience
Nothing in life breeds resilience like adversity and failure, because adversity had actually created an advantage.
• Adversity develops maturity
Adversity can make you better if you don’t let it make you bitter. Why? Because it promotes wisdom and maturity.
• Adversity pushes the envelope of accepted performance
Until a person learns from personal experience that he can live through adversity, he is reluctant to buck mindless tradition, push the envelope of organizational performance, or challenge himself to press his physical limits. Failure helps prompt people to rethink the status quo.
• Adversity provides greater opportunities
I believe that eliminating problems limits our potential. Just about every successful entrepreneur I’ve met has numerous stories of adversity and setbacks that opened doors to greater opportunity.
• Adversity prompts innovation
If you want to succeed, you have to learn to make adjustments to the way you do things and try again. Adversity helps to develop that ability.
• Adversity brings unexpected benefits
The average person makes a mistake, and automatically thinks that it’s a failure. But some of the greatest stories of success can be found in the unexpected benefits of mistakes.
“IN SCIENCE, MISTAKES ALWAYS PRECEDE THE TRUTH”—HORACE WALPOLE
• Adversity motivates
If you can step back from the negative circumstances you face in life, you will be able to discover that there are positive benefits to your negative experiences. That is almost always true; you simply have to be willing to look for them—and not take the adversity you are experiencing too personally.
PART III: THE FUTURE WITH THE RIGHT ATTITUDE
CHAPTER 6: WHAT IS FAILURE?
"Every successful person is someone who failed, yet never regarded himself as a failure"
1. I place high value on praising people, especially children. In fact, I believe that people live up to your level of expectation. But I also believe that you have to base your praise on truth. You don’t make up nice things to say about others. Here’s the approach I use to encourage and lead others:
Value people.
Praise effort.
Reward performance.
5. Seven abilities needed to fail forward:
• Reject rejection
“People who blame external events do not lose self-esteem when bad events strike”. To keep the right perspective, take responsibility for your actions, but don’t take failure personally.
• See failure as temporary
People who personalize failure see a problem as a hole they’re permanently stuck in. But achievers see any predicament as temporary.
• See failures as isolated incidents
When achievers fail, they see it as a momentary event, not a lifelong epidemic. It’s not personal. If you want to succeed, don’t let any single incident color your view of yourself.
• Keep expectations realistic
It takes time, effort, and the ability to overcome setbacks. You have to approach each day with reasonable expectations and not get your feelings hurt when everything doesn’t turn out perfectly.
• Focus on strengths
If a weakness is a matter of character, it needs much attention. Focus on it until you shore it up. Otherwise, the best bet for failing forward is developing and maximizing your strengths.
• Vary approaches to achievement
Achievers are willing to vary their approaches to problems. That’s important in every walk of life, not just business.
• Bounce back
All achievers have in common the ability to bounce back after an error, mistake, or failure. The key to bouncing back is found in your attitude toward the outcome.
CHAPTER 7: WHAT IS SUCCESS?
"Attitude determines how far you can go on the success journey"
1. What is success? What does it look like? Most people have a vague picture of what it means to be a successful person that looks something like this:
The wealth of Bill Gates,
the physique of Arnold Schwarzenegger,
(or Tyra Banks),
the intelligence of Albert Einstein,
the athletic ability of Michael Jordan,
the business prowess of Donald Trump,
the social grace and poise of Jackie Kennedy,
the imagination of Walt Disney, and
the heart of Mother Teresa.
That sounds absurd, but it’s closer to the truth than we would like to admit. Many of us picture success as looking like someone other than who we are. That’s the wrong way to think about it. If you tried to become just like even one of these other people, you wouldn’t be successful. You would be a bad imitation of them, and you would eliminate the possibility of becoming the person you were meant to be.
2. The most common misconceptions about success:
• Wealth
A lot of people believe that if they accumulate wealth, they will be successful. But wealth doesn’t eliminate current problems, and it introduces many new ones. If you don’t believe that, look at the lives of lottery winners. Wealth does not bring contentment or success.
• A special feeling
Another common misconception is that people have achieved success when they feel successful or happy. Life is uncertain, and emotions aren’t stable. Happiness simply cannot be relied upon as a measure of success.
• Specific and worthwhile possessions
Possessions are at best a temporary fix. Success cannot be attained or measured that way.
• Power
Abraham Lincoln echoed that belief when he said, “Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man’s character, give him power”. Power really is a test of character. In the hands of a person of integrity, it is of tremendous benefit; in the hands of a tyrant, it causes terrible destruction.
• Achievement
Success isn’t a list of goals to be checked off one after another. It’s not reaching a destination. Success is a journey.
3. If success is a journey, how do you get started? What does it take to be successful?Two things are required: the right attitude toward success and the right principles for getting there. Once you redefine success as a journey, you can maintain the right attitude toward it. Then you’re ready to start the process. The results may be as unique as each individual, but the process is the same for everyone. Here is my definition of success:
Success is . . .
Knowing your purpose in life,
Growing to reach your maximum potential, and
Sowing seeds that benefit others.
4. To get a better handle on these aspects of success, let’s take a look at each one of them:
A. Knowing your purpose
Each of us has a purpose for which we were created. Our responsibility—and our greatest joy—is to identify it.
Here are some questions to ask yourself to help you identify your purpose:
~ For what am I searching? All of us have a strong desire buried in our hearts, something that speaks to our deepest thoughts and feelings, something that sets our souls on fire. You only need to find it.
~ Why was I created? Each of us is different. Think about your unique mix of abilities, the resources available to you, your personal history, and the opportunities around you. If you objectively identify these factors and discover the desire of your heart, you will have done a lot toward discovering your purpose in life.
~ Do I believe in my potential? If you don’t believe that you have potential, you will never try to reach it. You should take the advice of President Theodore Roosevelt, who said, “Do what you can, with what you have, where you are”. If you do that with your eyes fixed on your life purpose, what else can be expected of you?
~When do I start? The answer to that question is NOW.
B. Growing to your potential
We have nearly limitless potential, yet too few ever try to reach it. Why? The answer lies in this: We can do anything, but we can’t do everything.
Here are four principles to put you on the road to growing toward your potential:
• Concentrate on one main goal
Nobody ever reached her potential by scattering herself in twenty directions. Reaching your potential requires focus.
• Concrentrate on continual improvement
Commitment to continual improvement is the key to reaching your potential and to being successful.
• Forget the past
My friend Jack Hayford, commented, “The past is a dead issue, and we can’t gain any momentum moving toward tomorrow if we are dragging the past behind us”. Remember, no matter what you’ve faced in the past, you have the potential to overcome it.
• Focus on the future
You still have room to improve yourself. You can become better tomorrow than you are today. As the Spanish proverb says, “He who does not look ahead remains behind”.
C. Sowing seed that benefit others
It’s been said that we make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give. Albert Schweitzer stated it even more strongly: “The purpose of human life is to serve, and to show compassion and the will to help others“.
“All of us are born for a reason, but all of us don’t discover why. Success in life has nothing to do with what you gain in life or accomplish for yourself. It’s what you do for others” (Danny Thomas)
5. Having the right view of success can help you keep a positive attitude about yourself and life, nonmatter what kind of circumstances you find yourself in. And if you can help the people you lead to adopt that same view of success, you can help them to always have hope and to become successful. Why? Because all people—regardless of talent level, education, or upbringing—are capable of knowing their purpose, growing to their maximum potential, and sowing seeds that benefit others. And helping people is what leadership is really all about.
CHAPTER 8: HOW CAN A LEADER KEEP CLIMBING?
"Leaders have to give up to go up"
1. Many people today want to climb up the corporate ladder because they believe that freedom and power are the prizes waiting at the top. What they don’t realize is that the true nature of leadership is really sacrifice. Most people will acknowledge that sacrifices are necessary fairly early in a leadership career. People give up many things in order to gain potential opportunities.
2. Sacrifice is a constant in leadership. It is an ongoing process, not a one-time payment. It’s an attitude that any successful leader must maintain. Any time you know that the step is right, don’t hesitate to make a sacrifice.
3. Leaders who want to rise have to do more than take an occasional cut in pay. They have to give up their rights. As my friend Gerald Brooks says, “When you become a leader, you lose the right to think about yourself”. For every person, the nature of the sacrifice may be different. Leaders give up to go up. That’s true of every leader regardless of profession. Usually, the higher that leader has climbed, the greater the sacrifices he has made.
4. What successful people find to be true becomes even clearer to them when they become leaders. There is no success without an attitude of sacrifice. The higher the level of leadership you want to reach, the greater the sacrifices you will have to make. To go up, you have to give up. That is the true nature of leadership. That is the power of the right attitude.
101 ATTITUDE
JOHN C. MAXWELL
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